Thursday, January 31, 2008 | posted by Cathleen Kennedy

Your Pets Hate You and are Secretly Plotting Your Demise

Ahoy there sailors! It has been a while since I last graced the pages of elevennames. I had a good reason, I swear, but cant remember it right now . . . . something about updating twice a few weeks back.

It has been an unusual few days for those of us in north western P.A. You see, on Tuesday we woke up to temperatures of 40+ degrees and sun, which promptly melted our think blanket of snow. The next day was no less sunny, but temperatures had dropped to 15 degrees with a wind chill of -3. Suffice to say that many a person was startled Wednesday morning when they stepped out in to the shinning sun and freezing wind. And all of this crazy weather has put me in a mood to do something I dont often times do:

clean
(dramatic flashes of light and music)

I wouldn't consider myself to be a messy person, just cluttered. And to be honest because I was sick for like 11 days I hadn't been keeping up with the accumulating used tissues, empty water bottles, and medicine containers. And sometimes I look around mine or my friend's apartments and cant help but think that if we let things progress much further we are going to have to worry about leprosy. It doesn't help that one of Zach and James' roommates recently acquired a pet rat. It is cute in that nocturnal rodent type way, but I cant help but worry that it is carrying the Black plague .

Which causes my stream of consciousness to jump to another topic: people who give their pets asinine names. There is something to be said for an original pet name, something with character, class, a story behind it like Moses Killsie Puff, or Herr Milch Mann, or even Squizgar the Untouchable. But naming your pet rat anything that involves the word cunnilingus is just too far. Rats and oral sex should never been in the same sentence. EVER! Its like cheating at a game of Candyland with your 4 year old nephew, or saying you are going to vote for Rudy Giuliani, its just wrong on so many levels. And dont get me started on the people who put their pets in little outfits. It is a secret fear of mine that one day our pets will rise up, take over the world then dress us in tutus and little clown suits and rename us idiotic things like Foxy and Spot.

Well, thats enough babbling from me today. Really I was at a loss for what to say after Project Runway was a rerun last night.

Next week, hopefully a new theme to guide our ramblings.

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