And again with the updating thing.

Oh Craigslist!

Anyway. Hi. I'm sitting in a (different) coffee shoppe, eating a raspberry muffin, drinking raspberry tea. I am a raspberry man, do you understand? I am all about the effing Rasp Berry.

I am unfortunate, in that I very often find myself doing things that I hate. Primary amongst those, right now, is that I've figured out a way to basically hit Windows Vista, until it is nice and polite and has my dinner ready for me when I come home from work. It functions now as a slightly-more-annoying-than-usual windows XP. Did you notice that all of my metaphors involving Windows Vista involve spousal abuse or facial disfigurement? Do you think that's just coincidence?

Anyway, that's yesterday's news. Like some kind of rat on ritalin, we here at Elevennames are concerned solely with the future. Well, I am concerned solely with my future. Specifically, places where I'ma be going this weekend. James, who is a dastardly straight-edge type fellow, will never know the joys of downing two pitchers of cheap tavern swill, singing the tetris song as you walk up a hill in the dead of night, and then vomiting until he passes out. MORE THE FOOL HE, I SAY.

Complicating my "plans" this weekend is a major impediment. I lost my wallet. I lived on change for three days! And this wasn't even the worst part - indeed, even my beginning a sentence with a preposition isn't the worst part. The worst part was the DMV. Have you ever seen Brazil? It's about a million years old, and the last film Terry Gilliam made that seem like it was a fever dream. Anyway, it is basically about some Orwell-like (if only there was a term for it!) future government world, where everything is drab and gray and okay you get it already, the DMV is not an exciting place. It is, however, full of teenagers! And have you ever seen one of those guys who has really nice eyes and really long hair and your like, hey, that man is, like, beautiful? There were four of them in the DMV today. That is way too much beautiful man-face in one place.

Also, I am in a strange sort of existential dread as to what would happen if I'd lose my Social Security card or Passport. What do you do, in that instance? Are you cast adrift on some kind of Orwell-like sea of no identity? Just in case, I'm going to buy a gun or two, so that when the Morlocks claim me, I can achieve great status in their tribes.