Issue Re-Oriented: I've Got a Chronic Defect In My Head.

This is a new feature for a new year. I wrote a couple things for a fantastic website called Issue Oriented and I don't think it would hurt to reprint them here. This, the first of three, so far, is about identity politics, but in layman's terms: being a dude in the crowd and looking down the shirt of a female performer.

I may think too much. Or maybe not, but I don't know if that's for me to decide.




There's no dignified way to say this: I was looking down Sandra Malak's corset.

A bit of background, you say? Here we go. I was watching the World/Inferno Friendship Society (Check episode 20) perform in the Pittsburgh area earlier in 2009. Jack Terricloth and Co. were very clearly having a lot of fun, as the venue (Mr. Smalls) afforded them a rather sizable stage. About a third of the way through, I noticed, that the bassist (Mrs? Ms? Etc? Malak) of the nattily dressed band (guitarist Lucky Strano, excepted, who is contractually obligated to have a Disfear shirt on) was wearing a corset.

This is the World/Inferno Friendship Society, a raucously anachronistic band. Not a surprise, given that the men were wearing suits and ties. (And I mean real suits and ties, not a "punked out" skinny black tie.) I noticed it when she leaning down to yell the words back at the audience and my eyes slipped.

I looked down her corset.

My first reaction, aside from the neurological wiring, was "hey, that's a rather nice view".

My second reaction was "I shouldn't be doing this".

Here, now is the issue of identity politics.

(If now, you're thinking, James, this is a World/Inferno show, you're probably thinking too hard about this. Additionally, if you're thinking too hard at an Inferno show, you're dangerously close to missing the point. And you're probably right. But, on off chance I'm not thinking too hard, I continue.)

Of course, I wasn't thinking in those terms at the time. I was thinking about it in words a little more down to earth, like respect.

The voices in my head went like this:



My first question was: Am I respecting her as a member of World/Inferno and as a performer? She's playing, right now, music I like, in a band I'm pretty fond of. Choosing and I use that word carefully, since I had control of my body and my mind, does the performer a disservice. My gut check was swift and decisive. Really? A disservice? This is a grown-ass woman in a band who'se major themes tend to revolve around debauchery, alcoholism, drug abuse, dancing and chasing girls. I mean, the band is not Escape The Fate, by any means, but let's be honest: Ambiguity, allure and intrigue are three of the cards World/Inferno has been playing for a long time.

Okay, okay, but what the hell does drug use and alcoholism have to do with the possible objectification you may have engaged yourself in, I thought. Also, what about the themes of solidarity, status quo subversion and dissent generally? Those don't fit as easily into your casting of World/Inferno as a quote unquote crazy rock band.

The counter argument came pretty naturally. Point taken. That said, objectification? You peeked down her corset maybe five times over the course of an hour and a half, which she wore onstage, in a public place, where she knew she was going to be viewed. (This is distinct from the "she was asking for it" argument.) She's older than you, so odds are pretty good this is something she's thought about before, so saying she wouldn't know theoretically insults her intelligence. Also, you tended to avoid looking at her as soon as you realized what was up. Saying that you objectified her is hard to sustain on that basis. More to the point, do "serious" performers have to be without attractive hooks? Must performers be viewed without sexual appeal? That's a pretty white/protestant view of musicians and performers, isn't it?

Touche. Jack was making a big show out of the slit that broke his pants, terribly close to his crotch. And I acknowledge that viewing a performer as a person outside of gender or sexuality contributes to the current status quo. But, consider your epistemic position. You're a young white person watching a female onstage for pleasure. You, of all people, need to pay attention to those boundaries.

How was I looking at her, I thought? I was looking at her as the bass player in World/Inferno Friendship Society (a band who'se four studio full lengths I own, 3 on CD, 1 on vinyl) who made a choice in her wardrobe which possibly affords audience members a view of her cleavage, which may be more or less important to particular people in the crowd. Male gaze aside, this is a band that pays very close attention to how they look. It's reasonable for me to look, they want that attention and that's how they choose, gig in and gig out, to get it. It's likely part of an exaggerated, but calculated onstage persona, which, odds are, loosely match their offstage personalities. How they look is a huge part of their presentation. She's also a woman in a rock band, who wants have fun making music and make money. I'm a male fan. Do the math. That entire band plays up how they dress as part of their act, which, *gasp*, can be usefully monetized.

That said, I'm not sure I can prove any of that.

If you mean find a quote on the internet where she or someone from the band says, yeah we dress up because it's fun for us, it's a neat little shtick and it makes money, I haven't looked, so let's say no. But, I don't think the point can be usefully avoided. I'm at a concert, situated as a white male, watching a group of performers who are like me and it's reasonable to ask, I think, to what extent physical attractiveness plays a role in that performance. Dan Yemin takes off his shirt at Paint it Black shows, Trent Reznor has a fondness for tight black tshirts and (much love and respect for both bands) while I'm not quite the target audience, if I don't mind it there, why should I mind it here?

That said, I'm not sure those are equivocal. There's a power imbalance that you're not taking into account.

Bullshit and yeah, there's a power imbalance, it's not just that she appears to be female and I appear to be male, but that I'm a fan and she's a part of the band. Not everything can be reduced simply to white male dominance and a gaze from the relative safety of the crowd. It goes with the territory. It's more complicated and more nuanced than that, I think. Are we being used?

No, we're not being used, in that she's probably not thinking or vocalizing, "you know, I want the fans to pay attention to my breasts so they'll buy more tshirts." That doesn't make it okay and really, dude, you're impugning her integrity.

Okay. But more than that, am I over thinking this? Could I just be looking at an attractive woman onstage, that being the end of it and making the preceding pages an exercise in pretense and intellectual masturbation, like the guy in Propaghandi's Ladies Nite In Loserville?

Look over there! There's a cute girl 20 feet to our left. They're playing Brother Of the Mayor Of Bridgewater. We ought to dance with her.

Yes, we should.




And really, I got to feel uncomfortable around a different girl and that settled that argument for that night. But looking back on it, that doesn't end this questioning in my head. I don't have any answers, but maybe a couple provisional suggestions. (I find it kind of silly to be attempting to offer answers to the question it took me a couple pages to even get to and is still consuming me.)

1) Don't gawk.
2) Don't be a dick.
3) Really. That's all I've got.


Don't gawk is pretty obvious. That part really is about respect. Don't be a dick is a related point, which is don't take advantage of the exposure during the concert. My thoughts really come down to respect and being contrite. If I’m right, or at least looking in the right direction, then the “answer” is thinking of other people and looking beyond yourself, which is one of the big important lessons I should have internalized from punk years ago.

I guess there’s still more learning to do.